scariest feeling of my life

im wearing a sweater right now that just covers my panties and only me and my mom are home. my mom is sleeping and its 6 am. so because ive stayed up all night like usual, i was thirsty. i made some hot cocoa and some chex w/ banana. so i have a super paranoia kind of mind. once i get my mind set on something, it is stuck there as a possibility. well i went out to the table to eat my cereal and the dining room blind was up about a foot and a half. of course as a thirteen year old in just a sweater at 6 am, i started having a bunch of creepy thoughts.

(side note)-- we have a college guy and his roommate or someone living down the road that moved in about 6 months ago. he has had a few parties where he invites a bunch of buddies over, they argue, drink, and listen to their very loud music. i noticed he had some friends over yester day and chances are, he could still be partying the day after or for new years.

well the chairs we have have bars vertically down the back so i couldnt see perfectly between them and im sure it was probably a reflection from inside the house but it looked like a face. i held as still as possoble, reasoning that if i held still, the reflection would too, but it wavered like a person shifting their feet; which of course sparked my imagination even more. i heard what sounded like grass being stepped on and the 'face' didnt move. i was too scared to close the blind so i just picked up my cereal and hot cocoa and came hurriedly to my room, checking the back door's lock, and thought first off, 'i need to blog this' and here i am now, coming to my senses; of course AFTER i checked my bedroom window was locked.

christmas stuffz

okay so my mom is a lunatic when it comes to christmas time. she stuffs my stocking so full of stuff that she actually had to put a plastic bag over the top so stuff wouldnt stick out. my family does stocking day, which is just christmas eve with a special name lol. we open up our stockings on christmas eve kind of like a sneak peak of what is to come. so we opened our stockings and shamefully, i had a normal sized stocking full of chocolate and it is now gone. all of it. accept the haribo frogs, im eating those as i type :). like i said. my mom goes over the top. she bought me 20 gifts. im not talking about whats inside the box. im talking about boxes themselves. 20 or more boxes under the tree for me. now inside the boxes there are about two or three things for more than half. hmm so about 40 gifts total. i got:
-three new shirts
-2 new sweatshirts
-a puffy vest with the fur on the hood
-bunny slippers
-a robe
-a nightgown
-5 new cd's (hannah montana, kris allen. owl city, gigi d'agostino x2)
-seasons 1-3 of little house on the prairie <3
-an awesome knife set (because im into cullinary arts)
-an apron with my name on it
-a knife sharpener for the knife set
-really cool collector edition hello kitty pez dispensers.
-a new scarf
-6 new pairs of awesome socks
-a game called pass the bomb
-crono trigger for ds
-the brave little toaster dvd <3  :)
-owl city limited edition concert poster

-stuffed woodstock
-woodstock mug
-hot chocolate winter variety pack (includes millk chocolate, caramel cream, and french vanilla)
-monokuro boo piggy banks
-monokuro boo coin purse
-naruto frog coin purse :)
-cupcake planner
-2 new pens
-cupcake notepad
-new purse
-m&m house key
-duct tape wallet
-watercolor pencils
-bookmark (custom made)
-25$ pacsun giftcard (from my brother and sis-in-law)
-hand knitted hat and handmade/felted woodstock stuffed animal (from sister and bro-in-law)
-new earings (from my friend)
-100$ (from my granny)

is anyone sick of reading yet?
im done. just thankfully i didnt include my stocking stuffers O_O
comment and tell me what you got for christmas :)

all the best.
i decided i would throw in an ad for my youtube channel. go look if your interested in hearing covers.
http://www.youtube.com/user/theblobbystuff?feature=mhum

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cleanin for christmas

i hate when my mom says how i need my room clean if i want my christmas presents. get real. it will be a mess as soon as i bring them back there. it wasnt even that messy. it just had some clothes on the floor and she decided i needed to organize my shelves. ocd, bleh. im organized enough. i dont like the hollow echo in it now that everything's put away. T_T how stupid. i cant wait to see what i got.

i feel bad because i just started at a new church a couple of months ago and we're like family there. but i dont know anyone really well enough to know what to get them for christmas and to be honest, they didnt evn cross my mind. im not a huge christmas shopper because i dont have a lot of money as i am too young for a job yet. so  i had to make do with the small amount in my checking account and try to make home made stuff. which isnt all bad. but when my friend gave me a present i was like, 'oh really? thanks!' and i was all nervous and felt terrible. i might expect something from my friend maddy but it was one of the girls i hardly even know. (^O_O^) i felt like i had been caught committing a crime :P

google images

oh how i love google images.
they make good pictures for home-made backgrounds for my computer.
they are good for funny comics.
they are good for cheaply thought out pictures to add to a blog.

they are good for e-cards and/or congratulatory emails

they are good for everything imagineable. try it.

hell on earth

a story of charlotte's day in her own words.

has your mom ever woken up with just the stupidest mood? well today was that day.
 the phone rang and it was one of her friends and she was still in bed but i brought it to her anyways. she talked for about an hour. she's one of those people who if you interrupt her on the phone, will murder you. well after she was off the phone, i asked her if i could invite my friend over if i cleaned my room. she screamed at me and said 'no!!! the house is a disaster!' so i asked if i could clean my room and invite her over tomorrow. she said she would think about it. so she was all angry and i was going to make some lunch. she said she was hungry and i asked her if she wanted me to make her an egg. she yelled and said no and i said, 'fine then eat a bagel-dog.'

 so she made one and then went and sat in her recliner and watched shows from like the 80's. yesterday, i had opened the drawer of the end table and it was really squeaky and she had been watching tv and yelled at me to go away and be quiet so she could hear the tv. so i had left it open and left. today, she found it opened and yelled at me for that too. i told her why it was open and she said 'you just have an excuse for everything, dont you?!!!!!!' so she freaked out and said 'im going christmas shopping!! and you know that keyboard in your room was supposed to be for christmas right!?!'

 so i said yes and went to my room. of course she only said that so that she could get away with getting me less presents. now i nee to go clean my room so she doesnt come back from shopping and slit my throat.

fan art and fashion trends

FAN ART
i hate fan art so much. not because it's ugly, because it messes with the show youre watching. im watching naruto and i found a picture on google of him and gaara hugging and so when gaara died and i figured out that chiyo would bring him back, i was sure as heck that naruto would hug him and say that he loved him. but noooooo. no i find out it's dang fan art by some stupid fanartist. any ways. <<<rant



FASHION TRENDS
i hate fashion trends. not necessarily because they are ugly, but because everyone thinks i try to follow them. im homeschooled so the only grasp to public activity i have is my friend charlotte. i decided i wanted to buy some turtle-neck sweaters (not the ugly kind like grandmas wear). my sister came over to our house and my mom is like 'yeah those are the new thing with all the teenagers' well let me tell you, i have told her a countless number of times to never stereo-type me with other teens because i follow my own dress code. does she listen? no.

fashion trends are pointless to me. what is the point? you get to all dress in the same stupid clothes? okay. have fun with that. i think i'll dress how i like.

and while stereo-types are in the blog, let's add to it. i hate this more than anything. charlotte thinks that if you shop at wal-mart, you are like the cheapest hobo living on earth. im like 'charlotte i buy almost all of my clothes from wal-mart!' how does she respond? she doesnt. because she knows she's wrong but wont admit it.

well im gonna go back to my addiction of a life time so have a happy evening and dont forget to eat your carrots. O_O

hopeless

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U3ihJgTMS4Q&NR=1&feature=fvwp

this song always makes me feel better once i shed a few tears. i dont know why i cry from it. i guess it just strikes something from the past few years and reminds me of all the useless people i've left behind.

maybe you can learn to respect this song too when it makes you cry or when you realize how it affects anyone who listens. it's kind of depressing but also uplifting in a way that lets me know that even if i had to leave things behind that i cared about, it's okay, it's not the end of the world.

lawlz frogs

have you ever been interested in frogs? well i am and i think i have stumbled across a gold mine of frog videos on youtube. just go type in frog and you will find the funniest of the funnies

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=esI_CiuNj7k&feature=related

start here^^^^^^

attached to a cartoon

okay raise your hand if you have ever become so attached to a cartoon, tv, or book character that you cry for all the sad, traumatic things they go through and you cry unendingly when they die.

i am attached to every character in naruto. accept for tenten because she isnt a very important character. they havent really delved into her past yet. not sure if they will.
gaara is my favorite. i just want to hug him. i want to cry with him. i want to show him what love is and means.
dont you want to cry when you see this?

he is the most mistreated and misunderstood character and it pisses me off when naruto doesnt just hug the shit out of him when all the perfect times come around.
aw dang it i searched gaara and naruto on google images and just saw a picture of him hugging him. i have a feeling im close to that episode. im on episode 19 of shippuuden.

i feel better though. that is the best picture i have ever seen. i am making that my background on my computer.
i got distracted looking at cute pics. well this is it. i need to go watch more naruto to find that scene. im inspired. comment

the 5 a.m. blog

why am i blogging at 5 a.m. you ask?

the same reason im using google images and not making my own. wait... no those are two completely different reasons.

well im drinking dr. pepper. i went out to my garage while trying to be as sneaky as possible because me and my parents had a really bad fight before they sent me to bed at 9:30. i was going to blog about it as soon as i escaped to the safety of my room but i was to wary about getting caught typing.

i came out to my kitchen ate 2:00 a.m. to get a soda but my dad was up watching tv so i settled for water. as i opened the cupboard for a cup, hey says, 'hey lyss!' of course im baffled to no end. we, 4 hours before had been yelling bloody murder at eachother and now we are acting like besties...

well i  responded with an appropriate response. 'what is this? casual friday? it's 2 a.m.!' my dad is a firefighter so he is gone every other day for 24 hour shifts so he is usually asleep at 2 a.m. i guess i am just too used to my mom's usual response which is 'what are you doing up??!!! go to bed!!!' as she clicks away angrily on her laptop.

he looks tired as he watches a recording of chopped. 'why arent you yelling at me?'
he sounds confused 'yell at you? why would i be mad because you got up to get a drink?'

i started to wonder if he had either suffered a concussion or was playing a trick on me.
i drank my water warily and set it on the counter to proceed to my room to watch 3 hours straight of naruto on animecrazy. well decided it was dr. pepper time and ventured out into my garage to nab two of them. i could save myself the hastle of getting one later if i grabbed an extra. i already had the garage deadbolt locked and was past my parents room when i decided that if i left it to get warm, i would regret it and i had no choice but to drink both of them now.

my resolution is a solid one but i have yet to finish the first one. *gulp* it's almost gone now.

well since i didnt trap myself in one topic by naming this the 5 a.m. blog, i guess i can continue to make it longer until my blogging desire is brought to a close.
i think it's great that whenever my mom freaks out about me using my computer in my room i can just easily respond with 'im just writing in my book' and she's off my back. but th thing is, what happens when she asks to see my book and i have the same 45 pages i did the last time she sees it? *darn* hmm i guess i'll have to improve at lying. *drinks dr. pepper* but i suppose mr. dr. pepper sir here can take care of her nagging desires.

as a teenager or underage person, have you ever gotten near drunk and/or high off of a non alchoholic beverage? i have come very close on various occasions. not so much now... but im still on the first soda.

do i have a funny joke for you. well my sister in law is the type of person who likes to be on top of things and then some. she works at the ship yard with my brother (her spouse) until 5 o' clock and then picks up two young kids of 3 and almost 1 and brings them home to a spotless house. she is 21. let me say that her and my bro work hard for what they have.

jacob

this is just an example pic of my brother so you have an idea of what he looks like. he is the bomb lmbo >.<. anyway so *hang on maybe i can scratch up a facebook pic of erika (sis-in-law)

erika

this is her and her sister. erika is on the right (aka >>>)

(yay dr. pepper #2)
anyway so she is a very work and child oriented person and takes her responsibilities like a man (and/or woman lolz)
her and my bro have a split level house, two vehicles in nice condition, two kids, enough bedrooms to have a spare, reclining furniture, and awesome nice-paying jobs.
im straying off-topic.
she decided she was hosting thanksgiving. that's great. only her little family of four, and our parents and i were there. it was a great meal. one drink included was sparkling cider. *-* yes << thats what my face looked like. i have a history with sparkling cider starting with my sister and brother-in-laws wedding.
it was so funny. they had champaign glasses and i was literally on my sixth glass. erika is not one to joke with me. she is really funny with everyone else but she must usually underestimate my joke comprehension skills so she just never has been funny with me. i poured the sixth glass and she dropped her jaw 'lyssa! why dont you just forget the glass already!' i was almost on the floor laughing. i was almost tipsy with that stuff.

my mom started getting mad at me because i had pretty much drunken like all but two glasses of that bottle. erika laughed when my mom told me to stop. 'dont worry, there are three more bottles' my mom laughed and i continued to pour a seventh glass. i was so out of my mind that i ended up pouring too fast and it went over the far edge of the glass. i felt bad for having drunken so much and getting so phazed to have gotten it on the tablecloth. she laughed it off and told me to wipe it up. i did and i was so bloated i could hardly drink anymore.
  well i guess i'll make a different blog to finish blogging until my blogging desires are finished because i want people to be able to sort out my blogs without having to read through ten stories to get to the one they purposefully came here looking for.
all the best until im done typing the next one. have a happy 5 a.m.

found them!!

i found ll my pictures!!! somehow i had made a new picture folder and thats the one i was looking in. whew. well i made a whole new post for this so i might as well show some of the pictures i ranted about saving.
if you cant read this one, hit zoom on your computer tools in the corner. i didnt make this, i just saved it from google V V V

my orochimaru background i made for my computer >.<

my gaara, deidara, and gama backgrounds i made.

i have tons more of the backgrounds i made but if i showed them all you would never see and end to this blog post. i have one for practically every character on naruto.

then i have some pics of me that i saved

wow O_O that is way bigger than i thought it would be

and then some of the drawings i did.

i'll spare you the rest but until then, have a nice day and eat lots of cheerios. >.>

down time

i was writing a book but i needed some down time. if i have learned one thing about writing books, it's that you NEED downtime. i have had multiple attempts at writing novels but they all turned up negative as i went on a ballistic writing spree and never set down my pen until i wanted to puke.

right now i am relaxing. i actually havent written in my book for about three days now. but the new problem i've come across is that while i have been breaking, i forgot that i was supposed to be regenerating ideas so i might have to take a few more days rethinking my sole purpose for this book.

i could bring in a new guy *check*

i could start a relationship *check. check.*

i could have something drastic happen *check*

dang now what else could i do? this is my problem. so i decided that the only possible thing left to do would be for me to either take three more never-ending days off or i could wing it and probably forget my book forever
now i think about probabilities and decide to keep writing.
well i think i'll end this post like it is because im freaking the heck out because i need to restart my computer in hopes of all of my pictures coming back. i just looked in my picture file and the only thing there are samples O_O

the triumphant day of my success

well i have a brother. he's no ordinary brother. he doesnt walk around with his pants halfway down his butt and a hat turned backwards and sunglasses on but he is an abnormal kind of cool.

 i could talk about him for days on end about his coolness and awesomeness. he is just jake. thats his name: jacob. well my bro was any normal teen boy but to me he was the world. i thought the world revolved around him. i have so many stories i could tell about him but this blog has a specific purpose: the day i finally had a triumphant success.

well my brother was really good at scaring me and my sister because he was the only boy in the house and so of course, why not take advantage of that? he scared us all the time, occasionally earning a scream of bloody murder.

well i was sick and tired of my futile attempts to scare him. i wanted to get serious about it. gosh dang i was gonna make him scream like a girl. well i was so determined i didnt care how much he yelled at me. he had a futon when he lived at home and i decided it would be my best bet. he was coming home from school soon so i decided that i had better hide and now. i went and took one of his big comforters that was laying idly on his futon (which was in couch mode) and i curled up into the tightest ball i could and forced myself not to breathe. my heart was pounding.

i was determined to win this triumphant victory. the door had its usual sticky sound as it creaked open and he tossed his backpack on the floor. i swore i was going to have a stroke. he sat down and just so happened to land on my arm. lucky me he thought i was the dog and i seized the opportunity before it could blow away in the wind of failure.

'oh im sorry rusty, i didnt mean to s---'

me- blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
him- aaaaah!!!! get out of my roooooom!!!!!!
me- i wiiiiiiiiiiiiin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 *runs out of room in fear*

and this was it. i was successful. just try and scare me again. i may flinch but he sure as heck cant top that. i mean seriously loook at his face lmbo. i practically killed him lmbo. somone get him a bandaid i think he has a boo boo.

thats my terribly similated version of a band-aid. get well soon. maybe he will recover form the shock sometime in the next few years. that's how much i won. it was my triumphant day of success and he cant beat it.

charlotte's birthday, new clothes, and writing

im going to be at charlottes house in 37  minutes. she is turning 14 ^-*. yay!! im going to make her a mix cd for her present with all of our favorite or cherished songs on it. i'm not sure if she is inviting anyone else to her party but if she does, i'll be nice just for her birthday. i have a bad history with some of her friends. they used to be mine too bud, that didnt work out. i bought new shoes for a christmas program we are having at our church. i also bought grey leggings and black and white striped fingerless gloves. *squeals with joy* heh heh heh i love shoes. i never used to care but about a year ago i got obsessed with them.

so im writing a book. it's current title is 'life's best' but who knows how many times i'll change it before it's done? so far i have made myself write a minimum of eight pages per night and i have written around fifty so far. i'm going to make my minimum 200 and my max 300. im going to make it a trilogy because there is no way i'll be able to fit it all into one book. chances are, i'll only get through the second book but my goal is three. it's about pretty much, teen life. of course, it is a little better than real life, but this is also about christian teens so that could also help, as the couples are more love and not so much status like in school. there of course is drama but not so much drama as happy-go-lucky teens living life to the fullest. i love it so far and i hope i can have it published some day. my sister said she would be the first to edit it but i'm gonna have to revise it so she can read it. i have 'bad words' in it and she wont let that slide by with mom. i'll have to dull it down to stuff like screw and crap. lol.

christmas

yay for christmas. only 2 weeks left until i get to dig into the delicious presents that keep calling my name. it seems like christmas came really fast. i wasnt expecting it and it kinda hit me in the face. i didnt have anything in particular that i wanted so my list was non-existent. of course, as soon as my mom had bought all of my gifts and continued to pick up small things she thought i would like, there was no hope in me asking for anything else, especially expensive things like acoustic-electric guitars or silver 2.5 in. pocket watches. i guess i'll just have to wait to see what gifts are waiting for me under my bedazzled christmas tree >.<. well while we are on the subject of christmas, i might as well ask the dreaded question: where does santa come in? i understand the history of this guy who brought people gifts and became legendary so i dont need to be taught the history of chris cringle but on the honest side of things, what does he have to do with the birth of jesus? seriously, christmas is about jesus being born and people decided to celebrate santa too. i think honestly it is just the excuse that atheists came up with so they could celebrate christmas just to get gifts. christmas has become a national holiday for every religion known and to be frank, that ticks me off because it isnt meant for atheists and such. it is meant for religious people and atheists (and probably other religions too) take advantage of it and are ruining the value of it. and like i said before, lets  be honest, a lot of people use i just to make money because the economy in america sucks so bad that they cant make money on the rest of the year. if people can die on black friday (aka after-thanksgiving day shopping) because other people are sick pigs enough to trample them, then why cant we see what's wrong with america? when im 18, you can bet im gonna be living in canada. the economy in america is supposed to drop more than it already is. can you picture this? we are all going to be homeless soon enough because of the greedy people here who wont hire the jobless who got layed off. i found out from my parents that because every dang thing in america is made in china that they are earning the majority of the money. at this rate, china owns us. if they say to pay them back all the crap we owe them, we are screwed to say the least. war is coming.

the christmas cantata

i'm super excited for this year's Christmas cantata at my church. we have been practicing for about 2 months for this and i can't wait to get up on stage with the rest of the choir and sing my heart out about Jesus's birth. ^-^ it will be next week. i have a whole beautiful outfit picked out and everything. i'm ready for anything and i cant wait to embrace the stage fright. of course i'm not singing a solo -_- but either way, i get to be on-stage and that's a privilege. i hope my expander doesn't interfere with my singing. i got an expander from my orthodontist and i cant take it out like a retainer. look it up on google images. it gives my a lisp when im talking but somehow it doesn't seem to interfere very much in my singing. well, cant wait to get singin' wish me luck! ;)

the boy of my dreams... or maybe nightmares?

oh my gosh i am in love with a boy named damon. now if you are a christian, you understand that you shouldnt get into relationships with people of a different religion thats any more than friendship. well, he's mormon. lucky me. i met him in 7th grade on the first day of gym. that day has always been one of the best. we were and are friends since then and one day in about february or march of 2010, i told him i liked him, over the phone to be exact, oh how romantic :). well i asked him if he liked me back and his answer was no and he said it so fast i swear, i was shocked. has anyone else ever just had hope in there heart that they shouldnt? well, im a hopeless type with too much hope for no reason. im shooting myself in the foot just for the sake of having too many bullets. that's right, i have too much hope for life and it's all getting wasted on him. he doesnt even like me back. well i know how this works, love. i know how love is. it sucks, i know, because im trapped in it. welcome to my world. i dont know when it happened, it just did. and now im stuck and got no way out. i dont understand this though, why do i have to be stuck in love like this when no one loves me back? im unwanted by guys. other than the fact that damon's my friend, no guy's have any feelings for me. im just an extra. maybe one day things will change.