cleanin for christmas

i hate when my mom says how i need my room clean if i want my christmas presents. get real. it will be a mess as soon as i bring them back there. it wasnt even that messy. it just had some clothes on the floor and she decided i needed to organize my shelves. ocd, bleh. im organized enough. i dont like the hollow echo in it now that everything's put away. T_T how stupid. i cant wait to see what i got.

i feel bad because i just started at a new church a couple of months ago and we're like family there. but i dont know anyone really well enough to know what to get them for christmas and to be honest, they didnt evn cross my mind. im not a huge christmas shopper because i dont have a lot of money as i am too young for a job yet. so  i had to make do with the small amount in my checking account and try to make home made stuff. which isnt all bad. but when my friend gave me a present i was like, 'oh really? thanks!' and i was all nervous and felt terrible. i might expect something from my friend maddy but it was one of the girls i hardly even know. (^O_O^) i felt like i had been caught committing a crime :P